Can We Be Done with Pena?

Tony Francisco Pena: .162/.181/.207

Yay!!

Not.

As we all know, Mike Aviles came up somewhat randomly from Class AAA Omaha. Since then, he is hitting .317/.343/.492. True, he has sort of slumped recently, seeing as he was at .340 a couple weeks ago. But still... if your batting average loses 23 points and you end up at .317... you're fine, unless you keep it up and then get down to .290.

Ok, that stuff aside... let's compare three very key stats.

BA: .317 vs. .162
OBP: .343 vs. .181
SLG: .492 vs. 207

Um...

I'm not telling you guys anything you don't already know. I mean, we're all talking ROY (probably the only people in America, though, since nobody else pays attention to us until they get swept and can't believe "we got swept by a team like that," to quote one of the Weaver brothers, can't remember which, last year) about Aviles, and all Pena does anymore is catch the honorary first pitches.

Except for recently, when suddenly he was playing in all three games at Yankee Stadium (is it coincidence that Pena's father is the Yankees first base coach? Is Hillman afraid Daddy won't be happy if sonny doesn't get to play? Sounds very Buddy Bell, yes?) and not being pinch hit for in the 12th inning with a man on second (I know he got a hit, but that was bad managing. Sometimes I think Trey is sleeping in the dugout).

Aside from the fact that he can't hit, and he's basically Angel Berroa (there's this whole freaky thing with Pena, Berroa, Silverio, and Olivo, it's like a love triangle, kind of, except there's no love, haha. I'll touch on it at the end of this post) in a younger body. Now that he's not playing every day, Pena can't even play defense anymore. So what's his purpose? To waste a roster spot?

And I've heard them say before, "Well, you know, there's no options on him, so we could lose him to waivers." I have two thoughts on this:

1. Nobody wants him.

2. If they do... WHO CARES???

Try to send him down, release him, whatever. Don't keep him up here because of the bobblehead. Make it the first in a series entitled "Royal Failures". Berroa and Chris George can be next, and the series will be long enough to carry us through the 2011 season.

Extra feature: Berroa is married to Silverio's daughter. Pena, Berroa's replacement, is the second cousin of Miguel Olivo, who is the godfather of one of Berroa's children. Just one. Not both. Only the second one.